“There’s been a gentle rain all day and a delicate, earthy smell is in the air. A faint and exquisite gift. Especially when the day is full and focused, and important things and important people are filling it, it’s good to hear raindrops in the background, quietly reminding not to hurry, not to rush, just be steady. One thing, then another, like a simple raindrop rhythm.”
-Carmella Rayone
One week from today, Kevin and I will wake up in Atlanta and fly 1300 miles across the sky to Haiti, all before the clock strikes noon.
Until recently, I really struggled to find words that accurately describe how I feel being 1300 miles away from my son…then I found these:
My little “flower on a high peak”. *Sigh*…I can’t wait to breathe him in again. Retrouvailles.
And because this trip involves four airplanes (yuck!) AND a reunion with the my favorite little boy in the whole wide world (yay!), I’m feeling a little “resfeber” lately, too:
This will be our last bonding visit with him until he comes home, y’all…and just typing that makes my throat muscles clench.
Last.
As in, we don’t know when we’ll see him again because we’re only allowed three bonding trips and we don’t know exactly when he’s coming home.
We are still waiting on our adoption decree (which means our adoption is final in Haiti), and that’s when he’ll become a Palmer. That’s when our adoption will be complete, and when he will legally be our son. After that, the U.S. will not allow him to enter the country until he has a passport and a visa, so our in-country Power of Attorney will begin working on those things for us at that point. We’ve been cautioned not to base our timeline on the timelines of families who have already brought their kiddos home (because no two timelines are ever exactly alike), but if we follow their *somewhat* consistent patterns, it would mean that homecoming *could* be in June or July. I’m careful not to get too hung up on predicting dates though. I know that everything is in perfect order whether I understand it or not.
How on earth I’m going to explain all that to my eager-to-leave 4-year-old, on the other hand, I still don’t know. :-/ (Prayers appreciated!)
But here’s the Good news: this will also be the last time I’ll ever have to leave him on another continent…and because I pray to a God who not only walks with me through difficult situations, but a God that hems me in, behind and before– I can find comfort in knowing that He encapsulates this whole, mysterious thing. He will protect my baby’s heart, no matter how many miles or how much time is between us.
So, I will do my best to focus on that over the next 12 days as we are preparing to travel, bonding, and then traveling back home. I will do my best not to worry. One day, then another…like a simple raindrop rhythm.
PS- Here’s a great little video about how God encapsulates if you’d like to watch…
Thanks for the update! You may have already done this: recording your voices in a children’s book for him.
It must be so exciting for you to know you will see little p soon but I can’t imagine what it will be like to leave. Hoping and praying that the remaining process goes quickly and smoothly for you all. X
Wishing you a safe and joyous trip and praying that the time until the adoption is final and you bring him home with you is as short and uncomplicated as possible.
I wish you and little P all of the luck.
Thank you, Cathy. XO
I can only imagine how you are dealing with the adoption process, but you have come so far already! Just knowing Sweet P could be in your house as soon as June or July has to fill your heart with Joy!
Have a wonderful visit!
Hi, Karlene! 🙂
My feelings change from moment to moment lately. Sometimes I get SO excited thinking about him being home next summer, and other times I get so frustrated that he won’t be home UNTIL next summer. We first saw him (on Facebook) at 18 months, so the thought of him coming home as a 4 year old is hard to process. 🙁 That said, I do trust that God is in control, and has planned his story (and ours) this way for a reason. XO
I thought that the next trip should be happening soon. I pray for this reunion often. Hopefully and with God’s help, Sweet Pea should be settling into his new home soon.
Thank you for posting the video. It reminded me of my wonderful mother in law, Irma, who has gone home. I remember her standing at a big picture window at her home in the Cascade mountains in Washington state, gazing into the peaks all around us and telling me how this verse was her favorite.
It is a very precious memory.
Blessings on all three of you! Praying!
What a beautiful woman you are, inside and out.
Layla, know that I am praying God’s grace and favor over you, your husband, and your son. I pray that doors will open in only the way that He can open them. Most importantly He is in control and He will continue to fill you with His peace. Can’t wait to see pictures of the three of you together.
Layla, I will say a prayer for your family – – that sweet p be in his forever home soon. Safe travels. Pase bon vwayaj.
I don’t know how you even sleep with so much excitement! I will pray for your safe travels, strength for your family to see these last few months through, and love to surround all of you.
Think of it this way, this will be the first holiday you’ll spend together – even if it’s not at home. And what a perfect holiday for it to be…the “thankful” meter will be up very high! 🙂 Wishing you a safe trip, and lots of warmth and love to fill your heart to sustain you till his arrival on US soil. <3
Layla, I don’t know you, though we are sisters in Jesus. I have followed your blog for years now and have often felt like a bird perched on a telephone wire, peeking in through the windows of your home. I just wanted you to know this morning that (waaaay over here in Manhattan, Montana!), God has had you covered over the past three months through the prayers of a stranger you have never met and likely never will. You are that important to Him. He truly IS faithful to complete what He has started. Be at rest. Many, MANY blessings! Love you, Sis…Kelly
Today is our 9 year old granddaughter, Olivia’s GOTCHA Day. We celebrate with her every year and every year we re-experience the excitement we felt the first day we saw her at the airport 9 years ago. She came from Guatemala; my son and daughter went thru years of aching to get a baby thru the adoption process. Every time I read your adoption posts, I remember all the emotions we all went through in the waiting BUT in the end IT WAS ALL WORTH IT, and such JOY you are going to feel when Sweet Pea is finally yours will be indescribable. I am so excited for you. Have a wonderful trip!
Thanks for some perspective this beautiful morning (did you see that sunrise?!!) as I was sorely missing my college kid who is studying abroad right now. Your sentiments are so real and lovely. And it made me smile to think about you sending Sweet P off on a study abroad someday!
Amen! So well said — prayers to live it out moment by moment.
Awesome thoughts. Enjoying the moments you share. You hAve much love and faith to share with all. Blessings for safe travels and a happy home for your family all under the same roof. Excited for each update too.
Prayers for you. I can’t imagine.
Praying and sending you best wishes.
We are all praying for your fears to be washed away. Someone very wise once told me to take one day at a time. Hard I know but really works. God will give you the strength for all this to happen. He has brought you this far. It will make you and your husbands faith grow even deeper. You can pass that on to Sweet Pea also. Bless you both.
Yes, one day, then another…like a simple raindrop rhythm. Thank you for your prayers, Maggie! 🙂 XO
Sending hugs, thoughts, and lots of prayers. 🙂
Thank you for the video. Amen.
seems like it all takes forever! I could not be so patient! Bless you!
What a wonderful way to spend THANKSgiving!! This torturous wait will soon be over and your reward will be so great. Gods timing is truly not our own!
I am praying for paperwork to go swiftly and in order. Praying for peace and calm on your flights and that your little one is home sooner than later. So excited for your family to be together!
Layla & Kevin,
As I read your latest post and try not to cry, I rack my brain for something profound and meaningful to say that will help you both. Love and faith have gotten you this far, let it
carry the three of you the rest of the way . . .. I will be praying for you all! xoxox
He is growing like a weed! I know I speak for everyone when I say we are also looking forward to his finally being with you permanently!
Like rain drops, I know you will have a thousand prayers raining on you and yours. Here’s to time passing swiftly for you and that little bundle of joy in your own home soon
Prayers for safe travels, joyous reunions, and God’s perfect timing.
You poor things, the waiting for you and for him must be excruciating. I don’t really understand why it takes so long especially after he has been told. surely that would be hard for a toddler to understand? There must be a better way. Anyway wishing you a lovely bonding trip and a quick resolution.
Fiona x
When I read this I was so happy for you! I can’t imagine the joy you must be feeling. Through the long (and often very difficult) wait, just remember that God’s timing and planning is perfect and you will be with Sweet P soon. So thrilled for you!!!
Mwen pral lapriyè pou ou– I will be praying for you
I’m so excited for you guys! I can’t imagine the excitement of getting to see your kiddo & the pain of leaving him there. BUT, there will be an end to all of this with the happiest of endings!!! What a day of rejoicing that will be!!! (I know I’m stealing from an old hymn!!!). Much love to all three of you & prayers, too!
I am no a religious person, and therefore I don’t pray, but I will start for your little family of three. I can’t wait till I read he is home!!!!!
I pray all goes smoothly and God will be with you. You both amaze me with your strength! Best of luck. Much love and prayers
Linda
Sending you prayers for safe travel and I hope the days until you are together again as a family fly by swiftly!
Layla, God bless you and your family!
I’ve never commented on one of your posts but this one moved me to do so. First, you had me at resfeber ;). Didn’t know there was a word to describe that feeling. Second, I’ve have been in that waiting phase before. I know what you’re describing and my heart longs with yours. I will pray for all of you. Have a safe and wonderful trip!
Safe travels. Have the time of your life (and Sweet Pea’s life). I’m praying for travel mercy for you and Kevin. I so look forward to hearing more of your journey. Your friend in Nashville, Susan Hughes
Prayers for the sweetest little family ever!! : )
Oh Layla,
The moment I read ‘that’s when he’ll become a Palmer’ the first thing that came into my heart was ..he already is and always has been. The moment God created that sweet little face, He was thinking of you and Kevin. No set of papers will ever take over what is already in your hearts. I couldn’t imagine the longing from thousands of miles away, and will pray for peace in knowing that these are mere moments in your forever together.
Sending all my love & prayers. NOW GET TO THAT SWEET BABY BOY… and give him a big squeeze for me. 🙂
I can’t wait until you can being Sweet P home, what a WONDERFUL time that will be. Have a great trip, I wish you much joy and happiness!
As one mother to another, my heart aches for you.