We got to sit down with our (fantastic) social worker, Beth, (and her social-worker-in-training “shadow”, Amaris) again today- and over a period of three hours, we completed step 3 (of 5) of our home study: our individual interviews. I went first, from 9:30-11:00, then Kevin interviewed from 11:00-12:30.
I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed this opportunity.
Much like the first and second interviews, it was a chance to PAUSE LIFE and reminisce about days gone by, and share our dreams for the days to come. Like chicken soup for the soul…lots of good stuff goin’ on up in here whenever Beth swings by. And by “in here”, I mean:
I want to remember so much about this day, so I’m going to jot down some things that made it extra special for future reference:
– It was raining. Not hard…just enough to make everything feel a little more mushy. (Outside AND inside, if ya catch my drift.)
– When asked what my favorite thing to do was as a child, I answered: “draw cartoons“.
I found these doodles in a box full of some of my childhood “stuff” the night before our interviews:
I didn’t realize how much I missed Garfield ’til I saw that. And by “Garfield”, I mean, being however old I was when I drew those.
– Kevin went to visit his parents during my interview.
I always feel a rise in my chest when I think about how much he loves them, and when asked about “something he does that makes me love him“, I answered: “breathes” with a laugh- but I meant it with all my might.
(I found out that Kevin answered almost the exact same thing when asked about me, and I’ll never forget floating over to hug him in the kitchen right after he shared that with me.)
– Max curled up in my lap during my interview, but by the end of Kevin’s interview, he had found a new spot to sleep on the floor, underneath the coffee table.
He was really well-behaved and his “mama” sure did appreciate it. He had to have some of his shots updated recently (for our home study), and his “mama” sure did appreciate him doing that for her, too.
Next up, a visit to our doctor’s office for physicals next Wednesday. No shots for us, but there’s bound to be needles for blood work. #Boo #ILookAway #DoYou?
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I am so happy for you all….and I am impressed with your Chihuahua, mine would have been barking his head off. So protective.
http://thedomesticlady.com/2013/02/08/moms-triple-chocolate-cake-and-gifts-from-strangers/
You made me smile…again. I love your way with words. And I look away too. But because I have MS, I do have to look when I give myself shots. Wouldn’t want to mess it up! #itmakesmestronger
Whichever child God chooses for you both will be very blessed indeed.
Well, thank you Vicki. 🙂 We feel blessed to have the opportunity to grow our family this way!
Wow, such an amazing story! You already are amazing parents!
What a sweet thing to say, Christina!! 😀
So Sweet…I always enjoy your stories! #Itoolookaway Ps. Whats funny about that is…I’m a Trauma ICU nurse 🙂 XoXo
Oh my goodness, Katie! That IS funny! 😀
I’m glad to hear it went so well, you guys are getting closer to your new arrival. I remember back to the home studies-
sweet memories. And I look away too!
Thank you, Barbara! Happy to hear your home study memories are sweet ones, too! 😀
“Breathes”. Oh be still my heart. Your love inspires me. (I look away until after the initial poke, then I’m okay to watch.)
Thank you, Britni! 🙂 (Your kindness and bravery inspires ME!!!) 😀
I can’t wait to see what child God has for you two…..she/he will be so blessed!!!!
Oh….and I ALWAYS turn my head when they take blood….it’s either that or pass out! #squeamish. 😉
Missy
I’m with you, Missy! SQUEE. MISH! 😀
I always ask them to give me a sucker when I get blood drawn. <3
I may have to try that, Dana! 😀
When I first read this, I thought you meant Kevin curled up in your lap during your interview… kind of set me back a bit. Then I realized you meant Max and I had to laugh out loud. Seems your home studies are going well. Makes me smile…You will make a lovely family.
LOL! I just changed that wording so it would be a little clearer! 😀 Thank you for your kind comment too. We truly appreciate you taking the time to leave us such a sweet thing to find! 🙂
Layla, it’s kind of redonkulous because I don’t know y’all in “real life” but I am so happy for you, this process going along so well. I look until the needle almost goes in, then I look away 😀
Thank you, Claudia. We cherish your e-friendship very much, and I think you are very brave for looking until the needle goes in!! 😀
I love your attitude regarding Beth & your home study. So often people report tremendous fear and nervousness in this process. Your approach is so much better. I’ve always reminded people that your social should be your friend and advocate, not someone you fear. Blessings on you as you prepare & wait.
Thank you, Gwen. I feel very calm about the whole thing because I know God is in control, and you’re absolutely right about your social worker being your friend and advocate. That’s exactly what Beth feels like! 😀
I love your stories and the love you and Kevin have for each other. You can just see it in your blog.
Thank you, Angela. 🙂 I’m pretty excited about being his Valentine next week, too. 😉
one of the many wonderful things about adoption—you get a chance to examine and express why you really want children and to be a parent. How much better all parents would be if we had the time to “prep” for parenthood.
It is wonderful to be able to – sort of – be there with you during this process!!! I am so happy you have found such strong and amazing love! I agree with everyone else – you will be fabulous parents…I am blessed to be on this journey with you!
I remember seeing LOTS of those drawings – I think I still have some! 🙂
LOVE YOU BOTH and hope to see you soon…MAYBE 😉
Aunt Chriss!!!!!!!! 😀 Have I told you how much I LOVE IT when you visit me here? I do. LOTS! 😀 XO
I’ll be praying for your doctor’s appointments to go smoothly! Funny story: when we went for our adoption doctor’s appointment, we had to do some bloodwork and both ended up getting woozy. While we were sitting down, waiting until one of us could drive home, my husband said, “I hope the doctor doesn’t write this part on the health report”. 🙂
That is so funny, Lauren! I wouldn’t be surprised if that happened to us, too! 😀
Soooooooooooooooooooo excited for you both! You guys are going to be the best parents ever! Those cartoons are amazing, btw! Thanks for letting us in on the process! Love, love, love reading your posts about this!
You know Garfield is on Amazon Prime instant streaming right? My boys LOVE it : ) Yea, for one step closer to watching Garfield with your boy or girlie!
NO WAY! That’s AWESOME, Gloria!!! Thanks for the heads up and kind comment! 😀
I totally have to look away when getting blood drawn! But my hubby has to lie down every time or else he passes out! So weird!
Aw, poor guy! 🙁 I’ll definitely be lookin’ away on Wednesday, but hopefully I won’t have to lie down! 😀
So happy the process is going so well for you both, Layla. I know the right child will find its way to your home and your hearts. I’m excited for you, having followed you for a few years now. You will be wonderful parents. And, btw, the cartoons? Wow! You’re really good!
Reading through your home study experience takes me right back ours almost 10 years ago. Savor every moment…the process feels slow while you are in it but than all of a sudden its over and you are parents. We traveled overseas to adopt and I kept a journal and my hubby did a video loog…and of course we started our own blog to help keep friends and family in the loop. My cousin even scrap booked our blog. I have to tell you that after being home for 7 years our two still love to hear about our time meeting them in Kazakhstan. Being adoptive parents is something really special. You’ll find yourselves finding other adoptive parents and there will be a bond there different from anything else…it is such an amazing thing to experience. Best wishes to you as you go through everything you need to do in this process, and may God bless you both.
So exciting for you to complete another step! Congrats! We just sent off our dossier to China and it was so exciting! We adopted our son from Vietnam in 2006 and he has been praying for a sibling for years. We can’t wait to see our next kiddo! I contributed to my friend’s blog recently about my journey of infertility: http://www.throneofgrace.com/surviving-infertility/#comments
May God continue to guide you through this journey. All the paperwork and waiting are so worth it!!!
My hubby and I hope to adopt one day, and the whole home study thing has always sounded SO intimidating to me for some reason- thanks for shedding a positive light on it! It actually sounds like something to look forward to!
And WOW- you sure can draw! I have been wondering who makes the cartoon pictures of you and Kevin for your blog… now I’m guessing you do? They are so stinking cute!!
How exciting for you two! Such a lovely couple who truly and deeply love one another deserve to share that love with others!
And thanks for reminding me why I love my own husband so much!
🙂
Just wanted to let you know how much I am enjoying hearing about your adoption process. The sincerity and joy of your upcoming parenthood just flows from your words. There is someone special out there just waiting for you and Kevin to be his parents….he will be so lucky to have found you!
After reading your post, I realized how much I miss conducting home study interviews. Before having my babies, I worked at a private adoption agency! I counseled birthparents, and wrote home studies for prospective adoptive parents. When you are all done with this process, you and your hubby will have your amazing life stories, in writing. I wish everyone had to have a home study written:) Sounds like you are thoroughly enjoying the process!
Seriously, why do I get all weepy every time you post about the adoption???
This is sweet and touching to read about. However, I must admit that I am confused and a little perplexed that you have to go through such an ordeal (5 home studies??) to get granted an adoption. If only all parents to be had to go through such thorough inspection! You would think that by now they should have known, no matter what, that the child would be much better off with you than in an orphanage. Just totally shocked and surprised by the process I guess! Also reminds me that when they unceremoniously discharged me from the hospital a day after having the baby, I was shocked that they’d let me out with this darling thing I knew nothing about! LOL!
You don’t know how much I wish we lived close enough that I could drop buy and just bask in your love light. That has to be what Beth sees each time she comes to visit.
Thanks for shining your love through my computer at least. 😀
After I wiped away some happy tears, my jaw re-dropped at your awesome Garfield drawings! I used to draw Garfield and wow, mine STINK compared to yours! You look like you drew the actual comic strip!
Layla,
I’m so happy to hear your update. I was hoping to hear something about it, which is the reason I checked in today. 🙂 I’m very happy for you and Kevin. It is a wonderful, exciting time for you both. Having children will change your life, but you’ll never want to go back! 🙂
Kelly
I love your blog and thank you for sharing your experience with us. I thought I would never be a mom. I finally became a mom at 45 and now I have 3 little girls I adore. It’s wonderful no matter when and how it happens. But it’s truly divine when you have waited and worked so hard for it!
May I be your adoption process twin? I have my second individual appointment for foster/adopt Wednesday and our first couple interview a week later. Each steps astounds me to know, for a fact that He does know the desires of my heart.
I love watching your journey and wish you and Kevin so much love and fulfillment.
I’ve known a handful of people that have adopted, and they share the process. For instance they say they have a home study, but they never say what that mean. I’m so grateful your sharing this so that we laymen can better understand and encourage our friends without asking awkward questions.
I know your baby already has your heart and I pray he or she is in your arms soon ….you will both be equally blessed
I don’t often comment here, although I read everything you post. I really wanted to comment today for two reasons. First, your blog is so joyful, even when you’re discussing stressful or difficult life choices/paths. It’s beautiful and is a much needed reminder to pay attention to all the fabulous blessings around me every day. Second, I have a good friend also going through the adoption process. I never realized until watching her go through it what a rollercoaster of a journey it is, and I wish you both a miracle at the end.
You are a ture blessing and I can only hope that there are more people out in the world like you. There is one lucky child being “picked” out for you! Your words inspire me and if possible make me love my husband more, because I realize what you are putting into words and sharing with us is exactly how I feel about my hubby. So, thank you!
I reiterate, you guys should write a romance novel! Layla could do some illustrations. It’s another great way to work from home…perfect for growing families!
When your novel is made into a movie, Kevin can write the theme song!
Layla,
There’s one pretty fortunate baby out there that is going to grow up surrounded by two amazing parents. I was thinking of all that you and Kevin are going thru to make your family…too bad some others didnt have to go thru the same questions and home studies to have babies… I think of you often, and am following your journey. I. cannot.wait.to.celebrate.with. you!!!!!
Thank you so much for leaving us such a kind comment, Bethanie! We sure do appreciate you following along with us on this journey. It makes it all that much more fun! 😀
I too look away!….every time! I love how excited you sound (write actually) about your steps towards adoption, what a lucky little child you’ll have…..and he/she doesn’t even know it yet. Bedtime stories to Little Palmer could be reading excerpts from this adoption blog! They’ll never doubt how much love & anticipation have gone into this adoption. All the best !
Your adoption stories are so sweet and beautiful. I’d be a nervous wreck. It’s amazing how much depth there is to this process. You and Kevin are going to be such awesome parents. Blessings to you and Kevin. xoxo
I’m keeping you and your husband in prayer. God has a baby already in mind for you and His timing is perfect. Be patient and keep us all posted.
I’ve loved your blog for many moons, and I am especially loving your journey to adoption! So excited to see what little one God has in the wings for you both! Our adoption date is just six days away now, and we can’t wait to celebrate the addition of our sweet-lovie girl to our family! It’s been an unpredictable, but beautiful journey, and it is breath-taking to now trace God’s hand all along the way! No doubt it will be the same for you. 🙂
Many, many blessings to you both!! 🙂
Hi,
I found your blog because I have a wild hair idea to paint my oak kitchen cabinets black……..anyhooo after spending hours looking thru every part of your beautiful home I came accross your adoption tab. I am an adopted child – and feel like I have won the life lottery. I have the most incredible parents and crazy fun family. Albeit that I was adopted in 1966 and the processes were probably not as intense as they are today…. my mom has told me the stories of the home visits right down to the minute they put me in her arms….then took me away and said “now go out to lunch and make sure that you really want to do this”……she said that was the most anxious hour of her life….How cool that you are documenting this experience…..I am grown and have teens of my own, but still love hearing my mom tell my girls about the day I was born in her heart.
I’m so happy for you and your husband. I enjoy your blog and decorating ideas, but I really love your adoption story. Thanks for sharing.
Layla, You might ask the lab tech to use a “butterfly n**dle” (trying not to say that word, in case it is too scary). It is what they use on young children or anyone who has a smaller arm. But it can be used on grown people, too. it is much kinder and gentler. Sometimes there isn’t any discomfort at all. I got breast cancer in my 30’s and had to have loads and loads of bloodwork done. I got used to it, but having them use the butterfly needle (oops!) made a big difference in a good way. Hope this helps. And I loved your “breathe” comment, too! Kinda swooned a little. 🙂
“Breathes” – WOW you got me on that one. If a child needs love to survive your child will live a long life. Best of luck!!!
Thank you for sharing this journey with us. How wonderful that it will be preserved on your blog for you two (or 3!) to revisit in the future. Best wishes 😉
Layla, I have been thinking to myself for sometime now that I so wished I could send you a message because you and Kevin seem like old friends of mine, inspirations and just a breath of fresh air when needed. I am so glad to have figured out how to send that message today!! I am so happy for you guys as you progress on this amazing journey. Your approach to love, life and living is awesome. It has made me take a step back a time or two and regroup. Rethink the “what’s important” stuff and absorb the “everyday”. I am proud of you for taking on your fears of flying, needles, etc. And showing the cyber world that you are “real” with phobias too! I absolutely don’t look!!
I adore your cottage style and get excited when I see a new email from your site in my inbox. My only wish is that I wasn’t in New England right now getting buried in snow and that we were perusing antique stores together while the hubbies play a gig!
You are gonna be great parents – just continue to follow your gut! Simply the best to you both!
Wow it sounds like your adoption process is moving right along! How exciting! I have an idea for a post for you guys! I think you should each write a post about how you met and your first date but don’t show each other. Just post them on the blog! Wouldn’t that be nice to add to the “history” of your awesomeness together? …..just a thought! Or maybe a Valentines day idea, with pictures, he he! 🙂