When will Sonny come home?
I’ve been asked that question A LOT over the past three and a half years, and I’ve always been quick to gently remind folks that only the Lord knows the answer. He is the author of this story-within-a-story, and He’s the only one who knows its beginning and end.
Some people shake their heads and follow up my answer with, “I could never do it. I could never wait that long“, but I always assure them that if Everything inside them was saying adopt, and if Everything inside them felt like their child was on another continent- they could ABSOLUTELY do it and they could ABSOLUTELY wait however-long, because obedience to God doesn’t have a thing what we can do. It’s about what God can do through us when we are obedient. And I promise you, if He called you to it, He’ll get you through it.
This is what obedience looked like for me in this situation:
Yes, I hear You.
Yes, I will adopt.
Yes, I will follow You to ______. (Even though I am afraid of…A LOT.)
Yes, I will wait ______ years for the child You chose for me. (Enter literally ANY number there.)
And because You took the time to speak directly to me, and because I was created to follow You, and because if I take a big, muscle-stretchin’ step backward and *really* look at what’s going on here I will see that this season of “suffering” is actually ONE HUGE BLESSING, I will continue to say yes. You have my unequipped, undeserving, but TOTALLY unwavering word.
Proverbs 3:5-6 says “Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight”.
Our own understanding might say, “I could never do it. I could never wait that long“, but I’m telling you, for me, and in this season, trust and obedience will forever look like a straight path to my son. 🙂
So while I can’t tell you anything about what the rest of our timeline will play out like, I can tell you a little bit about a timeframe here today.
The phase we just entered is called Legalizations, and from what I understand, it means that our recently-released, 72-page Adoption Decree will go to three different offices to be authenticated. In other words, someone in three different offices will authenticate the stamps and signatures on our Decree to make sure everything and everyone who signed & stamped it is legit. The first Legalization takes place in Parquet Court, the second legalization takes place at the Ministry of Justice, and the third legalization takes place at the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.
We know from watching other families’ timelines that the Legalizations phase generally takes between 5 and 12 weeks. Obviously we’re hoping our timeline is on the shorter end of that range, but we won’t start to get antsy until we’re approaching the 12 week mark. 😉
After Legalizations, we enter what our agency calls the Passport and Visa phase. This phase generally (and pretty consistently) takes 8-12 weeks. There are many steps in this phase, all of which lead to Steevenson’s passport being printed and visa being issued. He will also be required to have a medical exam by a US Embassy-approved doctor during this phase, but apparently that part usually doesn’t take very long to coordinate and complete.
Once all of that is done, we will get to bring our Sonny boy home. So, if I do the math, our current timeframe is anywhere between 3 months and 6 months, which means he will likely come home sometime between the beginning of June and the beginning of September.
That might sound like a long time to some folks, but considering the number of months already under our belt (38!), it sure feels lightning fast to me!
Which reminds me, now that we’ve got final adoption expenses and a homecoming trip to plan for, we’ve got to really start pinching pennies and raising funds. I had some requests for “I am a child of God” t-shirts for kiddos, so I am making them available for the next couple of days over at BlogThreads.com. It will be a pre-order sale, and I’ll deactivate the site Tuesday night at 8pm (CST) so that I can send the order to the printshop on Wednesday morning. It’ll take a couple of weeks to get them back from the printer, so if you place an order, you can look for it to pop up in your mailbox in mid-April.
I also listed some of our previous Blog Threads designs in the shop too, so if you’re interested in ordering one of these shirts they’re over in the shop til tomorrow night too!
Thanks in advance if you decide to place an order!! As always, we appreciate every sale and will send 20% of the total proceeds to another adoptive family to help them with some of their adoptive expenses too. This month, our fundraiser family is the Cruz family and I know they will be so appreciative of your love and support too! I met Julie (the mama) on Facebook when we discovered we are both using the same adoptive agency and adopting children from the same country.
We’re in almost the exact same spot as far as our adoption journeys go too! Here’s a snippet about how the Cruz family were led to their daughter:
When we finally gave into God’s calling to adopt, we also felt a strong tug to adopt a deaf child. When we told our social worker she very kindly shared that they don’t often have deaf children come to the homes they work with. Later, we found out they had never had a deaf child come into any of the homes they work with. BUT, God put all the right people in the right places and connected our agency with another agency who DID have a deaf child in their creche. She is a beautiful 7-year-old who is always smiling despite never having any language. We look forward to opening up a new world for her by teaching her sign language. God truly worked everything out to match us with this precious little one!
I’m so grateful to be able to share that with you (with Julie’s permission!), and again, thank you, thank you if you decide to purchase a shirt. The Lord uses every single one to make our paths straight!
And speaking of adopting a child from Haiti, for obvious reasons I loooove sharing info about the Haitian adoption process with folks who are also Called to it. If that’s you, I’ve also outlined our entire journey (thus far) on my Adoption Timeline page if you’d like to see how our looks. But remember, what it *really* looks like is my son. 🙂
Praying for lightning speed!!!
Thank you, Julia! Whether lightning speed is 3 months or 6 months, we’re just excited to be *soclose* now! 😀
So excited for you! 3-6 months in nothing in the scheme of things. You’ll have forever with your sonny!
Just ordered a “There’s this boy…” t-shirt. I have a son that stole my heart, too.
Sending thoughts and prayers and good luck vibes your way!
Thank you, Stephanie! I appreciate your kindness and support so much and hope you have a Wonder-full week! XO
There is never too long to wait for your child. He will be with you all soon and for a lifetime. God Bless you!!!
Amen, sister! 😀 And may God Bless you too!
It is going to be a “Sonny” summer.
AAAHHH! I LOVED reading your comment, Beth!!! 😀 #SonnySummer
He’s your son, of course you would “wait” for him! I’m so thrilled to hear you’re in the HOME stretch now 🙂
I know to some, 3-6 months seems like FOREVER. If it’s that way for an adult, just think what it’s like for a child! I know it was that way with mine and is that way with my grandbabies. I’m sure that handsome little boy feels the same way. Sending you prayers for “lightning speed”. I am so thrilled for you and Kevin. Your positive attitude is inspiring.
Aw…I wish the Child of God t-shirt was big enough for my 14 y.o. son! 🙁 I did order the It is Well tee for me though! 😉
Thank you, Kathy! We did the Child of God shirt in larger sizes last month, and I’m sure we’ll offer them again in the future if you’re still interested. I hope you love the It Is Well tee! XO
Well then…I will most definitely keep my eye out for that large size! 🙂 Thank you, and many blessings to your beautiful family!
I hope you DO put that on a t-shirt; “if He called you to it, He’ll get you through it”.
You’re such a beautiful model!
Maryjane
Thank you, Maryjane! Always fun to see your name pop up here! 😀
While waiting the 12 years to figure out how we were going to be parents, I did a whole lot of praying and listening to God for instructions and hints. I didn’t know if I would ever get pregnant with the help of medical intervention or if we’d adopt or foster. I just had to be patient and wait for little tugs on my heart and eventually I surrendered to the fact that the exact perfect child would be in my arms at the exact right time and not one second before that! Learning patience (and how to be a little less selfish, too) has paid off now that I’m a mom. It didn’t take medical intervention, but divine intervention, as I got pregnant completely by surprise at age 40. My Mac is now almost 3 and he’s perfect. And perfected planned for not by us, but by our Father. He’s the child we were supposed to have all along. We just had to wait and pray and like you said, be obedient. I can’t wait to see more pics of y’all with Sonny! His smile makes me cry!
Beautiful story and post, Adrianne! –gv
I think that part of why you are the person you are today is because of the struggles you have had with this process of adoption. You will be such a patient mama! 🙂 I am looking forward to pictures around the Christmas tree in 2016 …
This really hit me right here, you know? I’m at the early stages of doing what you’ve done, and I’m scared, so so scared. I appreciate the words. Such beautiful words.
Hi Layla,
I have been following your adoption story and am so beyond thrilled for you and your husband. What an amazing testimony you have.
Your story made me think of a song that I love by the worship band, I AM THEY. It is called “Make a Way”. I highly recommend it.
Many blessings, Tiffany
I am also an adoptive Mom who had to wait continents away to bring my first son home after having held him in my arms. I know how each day in between can be so hard. I so appreciate you sharing the perspective only God can give in such a hard waiting process. Sitting on the other side of that wait I can tell you it’s like we were never apart. Can’t wait for your sweet reunion with your Sonny!
I was called to my own suffering about 6 weeks ago, one that I’m not sure will have a “happy ending.” I was encouraged when you said “I’s about what God can do through us when we are obedient. And I promise you, if He called you to it, He’ll get you through it.”. As I am preparing for breast radiation, this was a very timely reminder. Thank you, Layla. I know that God is my refuge and strength, an ever present help in times of trouble. I could never walk this path alone.
God bless you, Vicki. I saw your comment, and I just prayed for you that you are totally healed. As my mother always said: Prayers can move mountains… –gv xxoo
Speak it, sister! Your words are very encouraging to the waiting-to-be-future-mama’s, like me. :o)
i would love to see the “Here I am, send me” reprinted. It ran out before I could order it.
Yay!!! Christmas will be y’alls best one yet!!!
Wow, you’re amazing…. like seriously amazing.
Layla: If even ONE person had the audacity to say to you: “I couldn’t do it, I couldn’t wait that long” then they are a useless person. DO NOT LET THEM GET TO YOU, and I do NOT think you HAVE let it get to you. 🙂 I had to wait and wait and pray and pray to get pregnant with my son, and I know what it’s like to WAIT. It’s excruciating. One needs encouragement, not negative comments of HOW LONG it takes. If they think that, GREAT, good for them! BUT THEY SHOULD SAY IT IN THEIR OWN MIND, and NOT to the person waiting!!!!! And: what you wrote above, I live by, and have passed it on to my son, who, by the way, is now 25!! 🙂 (See, waiting works and patience is a virtue! LOL!) “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not unto your own understanding…” Sonny will arrive and come to you when it is TIME for him to be there. And I think that you are READY for the matchbox cars, trucks, toys, figures, soccer practices, play dates, McDonald trips, lunch-packing, video-game playing, video-game BUYING, and be ready for you’re not liking a friend that Sonny likes but you will try to be nice or, worse, you like Sonny’s friend, but NOT the mother, etc., etc., etc. LOL! AND I know YOU ARE READY. 🙂 You are ready to be a MOTHER and with all that it entails! 🙂 Well, especially the LOVE, and I know you and Kevin got that down pat already. –gv xxoo p.s. Sorry for the rant! I probably DO truly sound like an old mom know-it-all! 😉 But I am so happy for you all, that this IS coming to fruition. Patience IS a virtue…
Layla and Kevin –
Each day that goes by is one day closer, one day less wait. I’m so happy for all of you and can’t wait to see the Gotcha Day pictures!
Layla,
Your understanding of God’s timing is encouraging to me. The only way each of us gets through our tailor-made suffering is because we’ve been given tailor-made grace.
I didn’t receive grace to go through an extended adoption process, and you didn’t get the grace needed to live with a debilitating chronic illness. God sanctifies us and makes us like Christ with exactly the trials we need. And then He gives us the grace to be purified and polished, and a little more conformed to the Son.
Thank you for encouraging me today.
So many chapters and sub-chapters in our lives …… we momma bears will not be stopped, no matter what. I have never adopted, but I am a mother and understand completely the great lengths that we may be required to go for our children – my oldest sweet pea has Down Syndrome and my middle precious had cancer. Many, many days of trusting His ways and NOT my own understanding. Lots of submitting and surrendering. This post makes me think of one of my favorite Third Day songs …….”Just to Be With You” …… brings me to my knees every time. If I was “techy” I would post it, but I am not, so maybe google it? :). Can not wait for that sweet boy to be HOME. Prayers for you Warrior Momma!